Good reads... La Vie Devant Soi Le Petit Nicolas L'Etranger Chocolat The Bondmaid Laughable Loves Inventing the Abbots A Clockwork Orange The Little Prince Creepy Susie and 13 other tragic tales for troubled children Life After God Lizard The Gashlycrumb Tinies Richard Herring's Talking Cock
having my lunch of vegetarian rendang with leftover rice now. totally loving this shit, man. everyone's gone downtown and im just parked in front of my comp in my pyjamas watching random stuff on tv and listening to the emo chinese music frm the funeral downstairs. sounds like something out of those chinese period tv series. at my funeral, i want them to play zhi3 yao4 wei4 ni3 huo2 yi4 tian1. just for kicks. and then i want vox to do Prayer of the Children.
late late night last night. drunk cousins and supper at tiong bahru and drunk cousins. did i mention drunk cousins?
my self-esteem has been floating somewhere in the negative range the past few days. wake up in the morning and feel like i want to crawl into a hole in the ground and stay there. fucking pms. i hate how pple think pms is just a figment of women's imagination. i can tell you it fucking is NOT. cos i don't do any counting; as soon as i start feeling as down as i did yesterday, i know it's coming. dammit. so angsty. so anyway, the red sea came today and the washed all the blahness away. tt's prob the only great thing bout getting my period- no more pms.
on the brighter side, tim has gotten me a lobang with some fella he says is über-talented- better than paul ponnudurai, he tells me. so i'm dying to have a jam with this guy. he apparently wants a vox to do gigs with but i can't commit now for obvious reasons. tsk... fate had better have a bloody good excuse for this terrible timing. maybe he will offer me a chance to be his friend-with-benefits. then future days like this one, where i am all alone at home with nothign to do, at least i'll have someone to do. do i sound desperate? i'm not. .... tsk. oi. stop it. i'm not, ok.
ok, moving on to the frosted cupcake now. mass later. something tells me i'll be late- oh dear. haven't been jamming since forever and i'm starting to lose momentum. no no no.......
does watching me eat turn you on? or are these pigout sessions instrumental in your devious plan to have me for xmas? thinking bout this makes me uncomfortable because i want nothing more and nothing less from you than wat i have now. how to break it down?
i'm addicted to this video. there seems to have this whole eastern promises cum cher cum marilyn manson thing going on. anyways, today sch was slack. good thing actually, since i only had something like 5 hours of sleep. i know- it's so ridiculous how i'm so adamant on keeping such unhealthy hours, knowing full well i have to wake up early. welwelwelcome to my world, won't you come on in. (miracles, i guess, still happen now and then)
i think my writing here has gradually become fairly esoteric over the yrs. not tt it matters tt much. but i guess with a job like my current one, this is how i should keep it.
oh, i forgot to mention, i love having the baby around. i think we all do. this is probably not a universal rule, but in my hse, having babies around always makes life a bit more bearable for everyone. it's like, babies have no pressure to be existential or anything like tt. they're just there cos pple like them there. maybe tt's why they know they can be all diva-like. wow i'm wishing right now tt i were somebody's baby too.
:: Bless This School - (the voices of my little rascals in my head)
ok so here's the lowdown, amelia: i've been fucking lazy at work recently. i dunno why. i hope it's not cos i'm losing momentum cos i think it's waaay too early in my this career to be going down. it's tt one article i've got to do. everytime i think of having to complete it, i'm reminded of why i chose teaching over anything masscommy.
so anyway, almost exactly one year ago, i logged onto fb to find myself dumped by the man i thought was the love of my life and the one whom i had envisioned myself spending the rest of my (sex)life with. it seems likea really long time ago. still, i'm grateful for the kind wishes frm all directions. my flatmates, my old friends, my not so old friends, a distant relation.. it made me realise how many pple i actually knew in my life and how many good impressions i mustve left (at least good enough for pple to want to say kind words to me in my time of despair, despite our dearth of communication up till then). tt was nice. i hope i could find it in me to do the same to someone when the need arises.
last week, regina brought up something tt made my guts curl up in shame. i know i have a bit of an ego but sometimes i let it get the better of me and then i just wanna slap myself for being so self-absorbed. how are you going to say anything comforting when you don't even notice it needs to be said, amelia? shame on you!
in other news, i've been blowing all my weekend tuition money (135-180) on taxirides and food. as usual. tsk, i'm just doing my bit in feeding the economy ok! and this is good, no?
(i am just thinking of other random shit to blabber on bout so tt i can avoid tt damn article.)
right, so... all this contact with dysfunctional/non-functional families at sch and all has been prompting me to try and recall wat i was like in sch when mummy and daddy were "not on good terms". mummy always told us we could tell pple tt if anyone asked. which was good i guess. actually it's damn good. the worst thing you can do to a child is tell them tt they're not allowed to tell anyone tt their parents are breaking up. like as if it's something the child ought to be ashamed of. TOTALLY cruel. just cos your marriage is dysfunctional, doesn't mean your kids have to be.. unless of course, you insist on bringing them up tt way. then i think you need to be smacked real hard. how did we even get to talking bout this?
so.. moving on.. the extremely short (yet seemingly long) hiatus in attention i've been receiving made me feel a bit empty. and slightly (just slightly) insecure. and i had tried to take preemptive measures (such as telling myself i was just being delusional) just in case this were to happen. but it did happen and i wasn't ready for it. but i never am, am i, Am? so... what do you call it when it seems like you both seem to need to see each other every week?
haven't jammed in a while and it's beginning to feel normal- not good!!! what happened to the withdrawal symptoms i used to get? i should be cold turkey by now. oh man. cmon.. don't lose momentum now..
A falling star fell from your heart and landed in my eyes I screamed aloud as it tore through them, and now it's left me blind
The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out You left me in the dark No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight In the shadow of your heart
And in the dark, I can hear your heartbeat I tried to find the sound But then it stopped, and I was in the darkness, So darkness I became
The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out You left me in the dark No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight In the shadow of your heart Oooh...
I took the stars from our eyes, and then I made a map And knew that somehow I could find my way back Then I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness too So I stayed in the darkness with you
The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out You left me in the dark No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight In the shadow of your heart
The stars, the moon, they have all been blown out You left me in the dark No dawn, no day, I'm always in this twilight In the shadow of your heart Oooh...
:: Cosmic Love - florence and the machine
this song makes me feel like i'm in love. you know, i was walking through citylink just now, away frm my favourite haunt, and i thought bout how music brings out the strongest and most extreme emotions in me frm one end of the spectrum to another. like no one and nothing else can. it makes me feel like im experiencing things all over again. like this song makes me feel like i'm in love and how passenger makes me feel like i'm really having sex (doesnt make me wet or anything like tt but you know what i mean). music seems to evoke every possible emotion in me and somehow it feels like i dont need to live with the outside world anymore. once i've experienced every emotion possible in my life, all i have to do is lock myself in a room and then put the music on, and any emotion i want to relive, i can relive just by popping in the right track.
i cant even begin to explain it properly- the ecstacy tt overtakes me when i hear certain musical arrangements. i cant think of anyone else i know who feels as emotional bout music as i do. considering the ridiculous number of pple ive known up tto this point in my life, i'm sure there's at least someone, i just prob don't realise. i guess i'm able to be this affected by music largely cos i let myself. i think tt's something a lot of pple don't do. they don't let go enough. i've held it in too much in the past so i'm over and done with tt. haha i'm so emo. not like storyoftheyear kind of emo, but like emotional emo.
i'm really amazed at pple who arrange music so ingeniously like in this song. i don't even have to think bout the words to feel like im in cosmic love. and wat an apt title. some songs try too hard to make you feel this or that or have act-cool titles. cosmic love is just exactly wat it is. how unpretentious. and with an unbeatable build-up. am i sounding too cool for sch? haha does tt mean i can pontang tmr? i hope my current job will never become a bane big enough to turn me totally off.
i think you're obsessed. and it's so godaamn bleedingly obvious. but i'm totally revelling in it. dammit.
it wouldn't be so terrible if i knew for sure tt you were also just in this for a good time. but i won't know cos i won't ask. and i'm getting carried away on this wave of anticipation tt it's really scaring me. i guess feeling confused is better than not feeling at all, yes?
good jam today. didn't get to meet daddy though. cos i was lounging round the hse with terence. let him sleep on the sofa after his supper at changi village. cos i waited up to let him in, and cos if youtube, i slept ridiculously late in the mornite and then had trouble remaining asleep. finally gave up sleeping and got out of bed at 11. so we sat round watching tv, marking hmwk, and then later jamming. by the time we made it out of the hse to get lunch, it was 3. i'm so good at fucking up my body clock and creating plenty of opportunity to fall sick. oh well.
jammed at boons other studio which was surprisingly nice so we're going back there next jam. loo and cheam made fun made fun cos i told loo bout terence sleeping over. oh well. i was expecting it i guess. on the topic of things of this nature, i don't think i will ever see the day where i can say to myself confidently tt i'm truly sure of my feelings for anyone to the point where i can articulate them point by point, loudly and proudly. at least not in the near future. i felt so sure bout dylan but tt's gone now. i wonder if anyone will come by and make me feel tt way again. i see a couple of possiblities but we'll just wait and see what happens. i don't want to rush things and have them turn out like me and lidong. i wonder how he is now, tt boy. i'm quite sure he's doing good without a friend like me. and i'm not trying to be sarcastic.
today's jam was enjoyable. everyone was in good spirits and it just felt really fun. i'm relieved the tectonic plates in taiwan did not swallow our bassist. yay and yippee. i like how we all get along so well. i don't think it's something we should take for granted. oh, wonder if there'll be some (non-religious) xmas gigs for us. a sleepy but fulfilling, tune-filled day.
we had a very satisfying gig at earshot the other day. i'm very pleased. aside from a few cock-ups, i think we did more than fine. kevin and kim and tim came. and mark chan too. and some of my bacins were there. plus some vox friends. jing and nurul came down too. so it was all pretty nice. got more pple than tt lah, but these are the ones who im assuming came for me. {:o) oh ya, terence was also tt cos he better bloody be. haha. the bcs claimed tt the waitress stopped dead in her tracks when i started singing.. i'm sure they meant this in a good way. i'm really happy cos got lots of positive feedback. kevin said awesome set and to tell him when the next one is. and kim apparently told mummy the next day tt i sounded like jewel. ok lah, tt one comment, i don't quite agree with lah but was nice anyway hahah. terence said it was a really good set. so tt's at leats two pple who have a good ear who liked the set. i'm pretty happy bout tt. no, actually.. i'm fucking pleased. {:oDDDDD personally, i think brown eyes blue was one of the best. wanna do soem informal polling to see which songs hit home.
yesterday, an and din's hari teristimewa (hahah.. my new fav word). tiring but nice to watch. i'm quite determined to have a void deck wedding. now the problem is finding a non-muslim who's up for it. not cos i got anything against muslims, but only because i fucking love my babi and babat too much. so, my handsome mats... sorry, man; i can't do mock pork (not longterm, at least) but i can make do with mock-malay (see: melayu-looking eurasian, chindian, dark chinese, french???...)
so anyways, there's my busy week over and done with. good to know i survived tt. this week psle. meh meh meh. i'm working really hard right now... on avoiding the stack of compositions i'm spposed to be marking right now.
i'm a bit lost, having too many choices. i want to love. but you know, maybe i don't even have the time. so it's good, perhaps, tt i dont have ONE special someone now. no commitment. just a whole lot of touching bases with no homeruns. like playing on an eternally circling pitch without a home plate. when will this end? do i really want it to?
went to nms to watch little shop of horrors with uncleparty the other day. i dont remember the show being so musical. it was almost like rocky horror picture show. same time, i guess. then in his car i heard a camp and i realised tt i hadn't seen my a camp songs since forever. who knows where they went. so anywya, back home and youtubed it, as i always do.
acoustic gig at arts house this weekend. excited but pretty nervous, since we only just settled our setlist last night. marcus has a pretty nice original.
Don't you know love is stronger than Jesus? Don't you know love can kill anyone? So bring it on; wars and diseases You know that love can do you like a shotgun.
cck cemetery yesterday cos granny's bday was.. erm last week or this week or something. i've never really bothered to remember everyone's birth days. well anyway, i got there first and went to the flower shop and picked up lots of flowers- 7$ to be exact. and then tried to remember the way to grave. gave granny the red rose and a sprig of purple orchids and two brightly-coloured sunfloweresque flowers. duno wat they're called. then spent the next 15 mins trying to ration the other flowers to the lonely graves. sometimes it feels i'm an indie movie all by myself; trudging through unkempt graves in my kebaya and jeans, jumping over drains, taking random pictures of the sky and the egrets, my open bag and my stuff strewn all over someones marble grave. i always remember to smile at the pictures, so they don't get angry with me.
cousin's wedding tmr night and i'm going full-on with the bibik getup. i'm actually worried i'm gonna be more gaudy than the bride, which i predict will be pretty embarrassing.
it feels i know what i think of you it feels we know what we think of each other does lust play a part in this? does lust play a part in this? does lust play a part in this? does lust play a part in this? can you be a part of this?
so.. i had this really dirty dream last night involving someone i know. but then i woke up so delighted; i'm not sure if i should be feeling bad at all.
:: Sweet Disposition - the temper trap (on constant replay)
why are you fighting sleep, amelia?
why do i like men with dark pasts? hate experience-less morons. guess i like knowing i'm not the only one of the two with things to hide. makes me feel regular almost. and it's interesting. yeah. ok mornite.
mike patton scares the fucking shit out of me. ugh. i refuse to have anything to do with him. i don't care tt pple think he's a musical genius.. i'm not covering any of his originals. dammit i'm gonna get nightmares. GAH.
it's too late to be up. i wonder how the nidji concert went. really wanted to go for tt cos i think i wouldve enjoyed it. but work is work.
today: new kebayas. ♥ ♥ ♥. there was steamboat too. and book vouchers. and a little liondancing boy. and oh ya, i miss poutine too. i also miss the smell of the reservoir, among a great deal of other things- like the smell of someone else's skin.
tmr: i wanna see dead sea scrolls, meet with band, maybe stay at daddy's place. in the further future, i want to marry kelly jones. marry me, kelly jones- i fucking love you. bloody hell i forgot i have more than 30 compositions to mark by monday.
sometimes i wonder what i do up so late. but then i'm sure i'm not the only one (wondering, i mean - not staying up late).
been reading the coupland book i got for cheap. i must admit, all the smartass quips can be overkill when i'm not in a receptive mood. otherwise it's pretty good fodder. lots of quotable quotes. lots of things tt speak to me. i like spotting quotable excerpts from bks i like and mulling them over. at least i have the mental capacity to spot quotable things from a book. as opposed to tt fucked up loser who told me he liked "quotes". ---- attention: imminent egotrip/diss-piss --- He'd just go round taking pics of or copying down quotes he saw- like stuff someone else had already quoted. i dunno.. now i think bout it, tt seems pretty pointless. and lame. cos everything's a quotable quote if you really think bout it. it's simply a question of perception. maybe he thought chalking up a collection of clever-sounding quotes would make him produce some clever ones himself. well no chance of tt. here, let's take a look at the nominees, dahling:
"I'm the kind of person that knows when he finds something special, and he never lets go."
"I'll always love you, amelia."
"I'll never let anyone hurt you."
"I'm sorry. I have no choice... I love her. I have no choice."
my, tt last one's a real winner isn't it. what a fucker. seriously. --oh stop being so bitter.
as i was waiting for my turn for the dr to poke around at my boobs (which turned out to be a more ticklish than traumatic experience), i sat across this really pretty girl whose face i couldnt stop staring at. she had cropped slightly brown-highlighted hair on top of her dainty face. big brown eyes which you couldn't imagine closed, a nice dainty nose, nice-sized ears and a really dainty - but not annoyingly so - chin. sort of like a pixie with big eyes, sans the elvish ears. she was really slim. with slender limbs. i guess it wasn't just the face, but the whole look and the aura she exuded. i just wanted to sit and stare at her the whole fucking day. im guessing she was an airstewardess cos she acted and looked like one (an sq one, i.e.). and well, if she wasn't one, she ought to be have been. i'd sit any plane she was on. and i kept rummaging through my brain files to see if she reminded me of anyone but no one came to mind. still, there was something so familiar bout her. a breast-check later, i found myself in a rental bookstore a couple of floors dwn. being the ocd freak i am, i had to walk every aisle and look even at every section so i wouldnt miss anything. at the "local" shelf, i picked up some book by bonny hicks. ive read her signature bk before and wasnt impressed but i just needed to pick something up so i did and when i turned to see the see the blurb, bonny's picture caught my eye and i realised tt my pixie girl looked like bonny hicks. i'm not satisfied though. i am sure it's not bonny hicks she reminded me of and tt the resemblance to her is just a complete distraction of a coincidence.
met up with rima, jing and karin for vegetarian food in chinatown. very amusing how much (combined) effort it took for us just to order in mandarin.
jing places order. prc waitress: chingchongchingchong jing: (looks at karin for help) ?? karin: er.. black sauce. (to me) tt means black sauce right? me: er ya i think so. (to self) chingchongchingchong... erm ya sounds like black sauce to me) jing: (to waitress) erm ya ok. i'll have tt. rima: xie xie.
hahahaa. it's not tt our chinese is bad. if she had said "dao you", we'd know exactly what she meant. but she said it in mandarin. totally threw us off there. it kind of disturbs me when i try to order local food and the prc server doesn't understand what i'm saying. i say chee cheong fun, she says zhu chang fen; i say char kway teow, she says chao guo tiao; i say cheng tng, she says qing tang. if its a hokkien dish, why can't the prc server just learn the hokkien name for it because tt's what it goes by?? similarly, you wouldn't have someone working at the nasi lemak stall asking you if you want "extra scaly hairfin anchovies with your coconut rice". you'd be like WTF. plus, calling different food by their original names makes them more unique, you know? maybe i'm just being anal, but i believe eating is all bout the experience. if i eat "luo mai gai", i feel like wah i'm experiencing cantonese cuisine.. as opposed to eating (insert mandarin name for luo mai gai), just another "chinese food". homogeny can present itself as a real bitch when you're a sucker for variety. where's the love in diversity, ya'll? and how did we go from recounting my exciting life to a dissing socio-linguistic peeves? tsk.
baybeats. only managed to make saturday. went there with shaun and alicia but they left when markie and the boys came. then terence came, then daddy came, then julius. i'm glad i went to watch meza virs even though i'm not a metal fan. fantastic presence and got the crowd really excited. quite funny though.. the whole throaty thing. oh they did a gothic metal ish cover of love song. their stuff is not the kind i'd listen to on radio or cd but i'd love to watch them live again. opposition party was good too.. with their mr samurai/ninja fella, though they didn't have the whole crazy cedric vox and jonny and tripped out female keyboardist haha. but at the powerhse especially, the sound system didn't do the bands justice. markie turned to us in the middle of the meza virs set and said: this is the first metal/rock gig i've been to where i can actually talk to you guys. and even though i'm not crazy bout the whole glottal roaring thing, i was a bit bothered tt the vox couldn't be heard loudly enough.
the whole night was almost like a mcm reunion of sorts. saw elias doing the spraypainting thing.. and indra- haven't seen him in ages!.. the last i heard (more than 3 years ago) was tt his visa in spore was expiring. but i guess he got it worked out. wanted to talk to him but i was on the ph and he walked off with his friend. and then saw josh, when we went to check out the pinoy band. he said his two bands' cds were on sale at the merch booth and i shamelessly asked if i could dwnld them off him. HAHAA. and then saw shaiful, and then michelle. she told me she was still teaching eng. cool beans. i didn't realise i had any friends my age who had also foraged into efl teaching. so anyway, it could be cos i'm growing old, but baybeats feels diff. the last time i went was 2006 i think. where i bumped into uncleparty hahaa. aside frm juli, i onloy saw ONE guy i recognised frm fsv. jules says it's diff cos it's become a gahmen thing. he's prob right but i think it's alos cos we're getting old. we're fucking old, julius. or rather, old is fucking us. anyways, the the silly little boys left early and daddy left soon after and it was just me, julius and terence. haha. just like tt no-smoking gig we went to. BEAT! started at 11 o'clock. kind of like the outdoor poptart thing they had in 06, which is juts my thing. bopping and gyrating and headbanging and handdancing and clapping and shouting along. i got so high from the adrenalin rush, my hands couldn't stop shaking 20 mins after we had stopped dancing. mummy made a fuss on sms and julius sent me home on his bike.. mummy made a big fuss when i got back. she was sitting in front of the tv with her imgonnatakeyouonaguilttrip face. and of course tt's exactly what she did. but as i lay in bed that mornite, i was still tripping frm the dancing and the scary bike ride tt i couldn't get to sleep. oh what a night.
next day, mama's bday. had semi-demi-fun. couldve been more gratifying if not for the familiar familial faux pas, and naik atas-ness and unyielding, unnecessary pride of various family members. made me wonder if i wouldve been happier just going for baybeats day3.
teachers day was fun. went back to sch to amuse myself and collect a whole paperbagful of presents. kids can be so sweet and so strange. then tutoring my two new students. tt was slightly painful. i hate it when my students start looking at their watched every 5 mins cos then i feel like i'm torturing them and tt's really the last thing i wanna do. i've always hated boring tuition teachers so why the fuck would i wanna do tt to anyone. but it's gotten better this week; the little one (and i do mean LITTLE) enjoyed my lesson so much, when we had finished he was like "c fini??? oh." *surprised french look* and tt made me feel real good. their dad's an artist, just like anne. how cool. i love french artists who enjoy living in singapore and who let me tutor their kids. HAHA.
after tt, jamming for feast day. we're getting lots better and i'm pretty content with the progress. also jammed just now at sonofa (twice a week!) and though we're not super, we've improved so much frm our last nativity gig. whee! i'm always so happy when i jam. don't fall sick, don't fall sick.
me and karin met with karol and jon for dindin. yes- to make a din, really. undersized meal portions, moonlight okos, japanese desserts with no service charge, and talk of marriage, cheap bridegrooms, the dearth of certain persons' sexual activity, my overbearing mother all included.
ok mother coming out to scold me now: 1.42am. fuck. gtg
just finished watching lars and the real girl. wat a special film. special.. just like silje nergaard's the waltz, or a jon brion song ost of eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. i wanted to say it was "nice" but i don't feel tt word does it any justice. fantastic acting too. it was all very... unassuming. makes me feel good bout life. you know?
it's come to my attention tt since i'm not sure when, i've been incapable of remaining seated and attentive for more than 20 minutes when watching a film. i wonder if there's anything wrong with me. or could it be tt i'm just being human? (since humans- i presume- aren't genetically engineered to remain seated, staring at a screen of moving colours for extended periods of time). but watever. it shouldn't bother me. it's possible tt i've always done this with every movie i've ever seen and i just don't remember because i seldom see shows nowadays. yes, tt could be it.
it's slightly annoying being stuck at home AND not being able to do things like dance and sing loudly because i have a sore throat, or cook up a feast or try baking something because i have stomach issues, or (other fun things i can't think of right now).
What should I do I'm just a little baby What if the lights go out And maybe and then the wind just starts to moan Outside the door he followed me home
out of action for a while. guess it's good tt i have to stay in and rest. next week is baybeats weekend so i want to be well rested for tt though prob wont be able to make it for the whole weekend cos of annoying last min commitments.
three weeks from now, i have three gigawigs so it's kind of annoying not being able to practise. esp since i'm currently jobless. but i concede tt being sick always puts me back on track.. the track of imgonnaadopthealthyhabitsfromnowonifidontwannadieof(insert random disease name).
as a result of being a recent homebody, i've watched more movies in the past 3 days than i have the whole previous month. *applause* thank you.
i'm gonna miss my kids. i wonder if 20 years from now, any of them will remember the lessons we had together. just like how i can still vividly recall some of the times spent with my p1 teachers. oh well, guess no point pondering; we'll just have to wait 20 yrs to see, won't we?
in the meantime, i'll busy myself with cutting up more classifieds while waiting for my aed news. got an offer from the HI sch and from my french boy's best friend's parents to teach their two boys. we'll see what the ministry comes back to me with. ideally, i'll be getting paid for training, while working my oddjobs here and there. sounds pretty fucktastic but i really don't want to put my hopes too high. remember what happened the last time things looked like they were going well, amelia? - oh yes, all too cleary.
keep on running keep keep on running there's no place like home there's no place like home!
wah shiok.
so anyway, life is ok. i wish i had more time on weekends though. i wish i had more energy on weekdays. of course this second bit could be remedied simply by sleeping earlier. sounds like a bit too much effort, think i'll sidestep and just keep on whining.
stupid and childish parents (not mine) are currently my biggest pet peeves, along with their ever-annoying children. seriously, kids... you CANNOT be stupid and lazy at the same time ok. just choose ONE; don't be greedy. lagi you want to be dishonest but you lack any sort of finesse when it comes to telling lies. stupid, lazy and dishonest- no brains, no respect and no friends. tt's just asking for a life of loneliness and boredom.. which the stupid little brats will attempt to ameliorate by blaming others and by an obscene amount of self-pity (see: the worthless lifeskill imparted to them by their thickheaded parents). for goodness' sake, if you want to raise your child to be socially defective, you ought to at least warn the rest of us. you and your child's incessant whining and delusion are producing a negative aura tt is invading my space and causing me to have a rash. damn yoo! damn you, i say!!
call me swaku but i just only discovered this song last night. ok, i've just swtiched the channel to mtv and maybe this will alleviate it a little bit.
but anyway, fantastic song. i always marvel at how pple can make music tt can convey and evoke such emotion. or maybe it's just me being emo. i mean, songs like deftones' passenger.. the way the music builds up and then plateaus and then hits the peak and then comes down again.. the whole thing.. you dont have to listen to the words (which arent always audible anyway) to think SEX IN THE CAR- shiok sendiri sia. so anyway, be at the esplanade at 7.30 for a setful of fucktastic energy.
gotta figure out how to rush the damn syllabus to cover everything before the term tests. i love my kids.
i forgot to tell you the fantastic things i bought at flea n easy; a white layered sleeveless blouse 5$, a karencarpenter/marieosmond-esque dress for 8$, la roux cd 3$, the gum thief (coupland) and pure drivel (steve martin) 10$ total.
the guy who sold me the books had pretty cool stuff. he said he had shopgirl at home but he wasnt selling tt. he also had jpod but i decided tt was too thick a read for my attention span. we'll see how i do with this coupland first. pure drivel is fucking funny. it's really... pure drivel haha. zehzeh's gonna borrow it after im done.
why are some weekends so fucking packed? it's difficult trying to multitask where meeting up with friends is concerned. i wish it were all like msn- talk, close, talk to someone esle, close, open, talk to another, reply to yet another, take toilet break, strum guitar while catching up with another 3 pple... blablah. wish it were all as do-able vis-a-vis. you'd think advanced technology wouldve found the solution to my terrible time management. ok, so maybe you didn't think so. well i did. so.. ya. back to figuring out how tmr's gonna run.
in love with this song right now. shiok. we should cover this.
gig today was good. don't mean to be smug but i think the sad little crowd liked us better than the emo-screamo bands tt played before us. tt's the thing bout those indie emo-screamo songs.. they all sound pretty much the same. oh wait, i've just been informed by marcus tt it's call "emocore". haha watever... i don't fancy it, watever it's called.
tmr, zouk flea mkt with karin! and got to call 3 of my kids' parents to make sure the kids are not having swine flu or some nonsense like tt. also on the agenda- mass and meeting up with daddy. jamming.. erm, it's only me loo and terence so we'll see how tt goes. maybe i'll skip tt for flea n easy.
school's getting harder and easier at the same time. the kids piss me off every day but i have one who keeps giving me little gifts. haha my very own fan. got my aed interview on monday. hope all goes well... so anyway, i've made a good friend of one of my colleagues and we have quite a bit in common. which is pretty cool. work is so much more exciting when you have someone there to commiserate with. she used to be in a band too. haha.
