tmr, i have a wedding to sing for at 12. i'm so sick of this routine.
i don't want to keep doing something i don't believe in. i wish i could just stop; but i've been going to church as long as i can remember - i know of nothing aside frm the redemption that's ahead.
right - so now, i've become one of those pple who go to church just in case - just in case judgement day is tmr and i don't wanna be last on the list. i hate this cowardly hypocrite that is me.

i fell off the Pedestal of High just now. dunno what pushed me off, but it must've grated me quite abit. so that i even wrote a shitty rhyming poem in 3 mins. .oh look, a screw just dropped out frm i dunno where and fell under my chair. guess i'm really losing my screws huh. i'm cooling off as i write this, but i'm still feeling bitch enough to thrust my shitload of words at you who are reading this...

You said you’d be there, I didn’t hear you wrong.
But perhaps you weren’t too clear of your intentions all along.
You said we’d be good friends. Was that like a vow?
Or something you said but don’t really mean now?

I try to smile when I see you happy.
But your bliss irritates the shit out of me.
Don’t turn your promises round when you’ve found what you like.
Cos I become a bitch when I’m full of spite.
I’ll become that someone I hate to be.
I’ll make you regret knowing me.

Maybe this is just another mood, another lousy day.
But I’m still angry so don’t begin to feel good.
I hate being this way.
I hate it being this way.