my stomach is full but my heart feels empty.

lidong smsed just now to say sorry he hasn't felt like talking lately and he hopes i understand. i'm trying to but i don't. is it me? how come i feel so estranged? how come i'm such a load of needy crap? the other day we webcammed but it was just me staring at him doing his work. i don't remember ever feeling so frustrated. maybe i'm not what he needs anymore.

i shouldn't overreact i should allow for his moods and i should not be so needy.

Que tu m'aimais encore, serais ce possible alors?


i suddenly remember tt he'd often accuse me of doing things for myself only. you must hate me so much. maybe he thinks i make love to him only cos i'm greedy and horny. i feel offended just thinking bout tt. could two people breed any more misunderstanding? maybe not sleeping enough is making me sad. maybe some sleep will do good.

:: Fake Plastic Trees - radiohead