i've been having this mushy feeling inside of me lately. maybe it's that time of the month.

today, this sickening wave of sudden malady took me over, for only just a while. so familiar, that feeling. then i forgot bout it, and i laughed again.
now it's back. i guess i brought this upon myself. i wanna give me a big hug and tell me it's ok... it's ok.

i'm not sure i understand what you mean, and it's making me confused - confused in a way tt i don't want to be. confused like i want to purge all this and vindicate myself.

the string hanging from my newly-installed roman blinds is scaring me. the little white plastic attachment goes clickety-clickety-click against my window sill. and it's scaring the shit out of me. it looks like a plastic tampon. the stingy breeze makes it go; clickety-clickety-clicking... the beat of dissolution. here's where i'm thankful for my laziness.

and so i begin to wonder what the rest of my life will be like. we are swimming in circles. circles that aren't really round. not that you would notice. do you know what this is about? it's the life i took and don't know what to do with. maybe all i need now is a good book.