listening to the radio friday night, i slowly brightened up (my mood, i mean). maybe the fact tt the day's tutorials were cancelled and i only had to be in sch for french helped. i was still a little deadbeat, but i felt sport enough to wail along to whitney houston's All At Once. was a bad idea not to warmup beforehand, but one tends not to care when one is captured by a sudden surge of bliss.

i've concluded (quite sometime ago, though i've never mentioned) that it's so hard for me to love someone (not to fall in love, but rather to love without unnecessary woe) because i think too much. and i think tt's a problem many intellectual pple face. [at this point, you'd probably be thinking that i'm some narcissistic bitch, which is partly true; but seriously, i find it hard to deny that i'm bent a little towrds the gifted side...wait, but tt's not the point!]
i've been wondering for quite a while: are pple's IQ always inversely proportionate to their EQ? but the fact that i can be quite excessively compassionate and understanding makes NO seem like the obvious answer. so i'm training myself to avoid asking me that qn. shit am i good at digressing...

so anyway, as i was saying... for one who thinks so much, it's really hard to love because i think bout it too much to feel it freely. i'm not ashamed to say i love to love and no less, i love to be loved. i wonder if Milan Kundera is lonely... i mean, really. it's not that i think such a great writer is incapable of love; but for someone who regards love the way he does (the way i like to do too), it's probably difficult to love as love is - without question.

Creepy Susie and 13 other tragic tales for troubled children by Angus Oblong

A really good book. with each story i read, i laughed louder (mind you, it is not a joke bk), while karin cringed and lamented on the tragedies. my own laughter was so incessant and strong that i was forced to ponder on why. it's not that i'm warped and twisted or that i thought the stories too ludicrous. on the contrary, i felt that they were so real and so affecting that at tt moment, the only reaction i felt was powerful enough to express this was laughter.

i know this entry's a tad lengthy, and chances are you might be bored frm reading my recent rants. but guess what? - i don't give a fuck! hah! so there! {:oP
as long as i'm on this somewhat indecisive earth, and suffering ever-fluctuating hormones, i'll write and write as i please! ah-haha!